Recently, I was thinking about many of the things I value in my life. I thought about my family, my parenting, my church life, and I kept coming back to the value of “Love Thy Neighbor.” If you know me, you know this value is very important to me. It’s a sticker on my car, it was imprinted on my heart long before I knew I was created for it, and it’s something I just can’t help but to be passionate about daily. 

Once I became a Christian, I realized that loving thy neighbor is actually a command for all of us. It’s a crucial part of God’s plan on earth. Some may even know it as the “Greatest Commandment.”

Many of you may be familiar with this Bible Scripture:
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law of the Prophets.”
Matthew 22:37-40 ESV

You see, this commandment to love is vital for us in order to be transformed into who God originally created us to be. We were created for love before we took on the influences of the world or the traditions passed down to us through our families. Love makes us more like God, which is the whole point...to resemble Jesus. 

But why is loving thy neighbor so important? Here’s a few reasons:

• It reveals God’s love to others.

• It reminds those who know Him to be interruptible. 

• It refreshes the weary.

• It restores hope to humanity. 

• It revives our purpose.

In Scripture, Jesus delivers the parable of the Good Samaritan:

In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. The next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’

“Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?” The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.” Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”
Luke 10:30-37 NIV 

This story shows us that the instructions of Jesus are about more than just loving those similar to you in nature or the person right next door. It’s a picture of how the rest of our lives with Jesus will be when He puts people in our direct path and invites us into the process of filling needs, expressing unconditional love with no strings attached, and pointing them to Him with no other motive.

It’s not always convenient. It requires our entire self to be selfless. It often demands us to lay down our traditions, our strong opinions, and our previous judgements. 

Let’s break down what the Good Samaritan really does. 

1. He stops (this models being interruptible) 

2. Nurses the man’s wounds (fills the current need with his own resources, not just what’s left over) 

3. Takes him to a location to get off the street (releases compassion) 

4. Leaves money to provide for the man (providing next steps)

It’s about a lot more than being “nice” or simply tolerating someone you don’t typically connect with. It’s more than waving hello to a neighbor that you know has different political views than you or professes a different faith. Sure, it begins there. But, the invite is so much bigger. With the Holy Spirit leading you, it’s a wild adventure that is always about Jesus and never about us. 

But, when we are not empowered by the Holy Spirit, we enter into those places of service with our baggage. We find offense, we get weary when the outcome doesn’t match our expectations, and we begin to check a box for Jesus. Or worse, we do good deeds for the accolades of others. That’s not what God intended for us. We must learn that love always costs us something...money, time, resources, and more. But, when we love well, it’s transformational for both the giver and the recipient.

It’s fascinating to look back at my family and I’s journey and see that everything we’ve said “yes” to was a result of loving God as much as possible as well as being willing to love who God puts in our path. Some parts of our journey were simple acts of service, some required extreme sacrifice, some were emotional, aggravating, painful, and some didn’t make sense to us or others. 

But, every opportunity made us more like Jesus, being able to truly receive the depth of what grace actually means. Each opportunity walked us through fears, exposed our idols, brought healing, and strengthened our faith. Each moment drew us closer to the Giver of all good things and helped us have a greater understanding of mankind and our Creator. We have stepped outside of ourselves, our comforts, and our own way of doing things for one beautiful purpose. Because only when you do for those who can give you nothing in return can you grasp the radical reality of grace. 

Humility has always been a highly valued characteristic of mine. I’ve been on quite a journey to discover true humility and I should admit that I am still on that journey.

hu·​mil·​i·​ty \ hyü-ˈmi-lə-tē, yü- \

• freedom from pride or arrogance

“Freedom from pride.” So what does pride mean? One definition in the Oxford dictionary defines pride as “consciousness of one's own dignity” (dignity meaning “being worthy of honor or respect.”)

We know according to scripture that:

“Pride comes before destruction,
and an arrogant spirit before a fall.”
Proverbs 16:18 HCSB

Don’t be mistaken: Pride, which is a lack of humility, can take many forms.

Rich Langton says, in his blog called Being Outstanding vs. Standing Out, “Sometimes we think we're too good to do certain acts of service. At other times we don't think we're good enough. If we're to be outstanding, we need to live with a sense of boldness AND humility – they go hand in hand.”

A lack of humility can be when you believe you’re too good and when you put off that you’re not good enough. Superiority and inferiority.

Let’s break the two down. 

Too good / Superiority → When pride looks puffed up

In Luke‬ ‭18:9-14‬, we can easily see how the Pharisee is arrogant while the tax collector comes humbly before God.

But how many times have you looked at a brother or sister in Christ and said “At least I’m not them?” This could be comparing lifestyle choices, how early you arrive to serve, how kind you are in speaking with others, and the list goes on and on.

As Matthew 7:1 says “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.”Don’t be like the Pharisee who forgot that it is God in us that makes us righteous.

“We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”
2 Cor 4:7-8

Not good enough / Inferiority → When pride looks humble

Let’s look at Moses’ burning bush experience: Read Exodus 3:1-7; 3:10-14; 4:1-14.

Here are some things I noticed in these verses when it comes to false humility:

Moses is not in his own right “good enough” but God’s word makes him good enough. When Moses approaches the burning bush, the Lord tells him to take his shoes off for He is on holy ground. Moses is unworthy but God’s call makes him worthy.

“I will be with you” for the Lord should be all that is needed. Moses received three different signs from God to use as proof to the people yet this was not good enough: 

Where’s the application in that for us? God is with me. Why should I doubt my calling?

Doubt and focus on ourselves causes the Lord’s anger to burn. We see it in Exodus 4 when Moses again questioned God asking Him to send someone else because his speech was not eloquent.

I read an article on this issue of inferiority from Psychology Today called “False Humility”:

“In a society that glamorizes humility, the enactment of humility becomes more important than a true embodiment of it.”

It’s like growing up in the south where your initial responses are “please, thank you, God bless you” all the while rolling your eyes or judging the person you’re speaking to. Up north, I have found it is not like this. I once heard a friend from New York say, “We are black and white. We don’t say “bless your heart” and then stab you in the back.

“True humility doesn’t seek happiness in the recognition of others, and in that way, has no one to feel inferior to.” When our true identity and confidence does not rely on God we tend to lean on others for our self-esteem. 

This naturally can lead to a feeling of inferiority, i.e. “What if they question my words, what if I’m laughed at, what if I sound stupid?” None of that matters if your confidence is in the Lord.

Practicals: How to stay humble and recognize when you are not living humble 

Are you remaining teachable? There’s always someone who knows more than you. Remain teachable. Do you have a willingness to listen and follow? We see this in Samuel’s life in 1 Samuel 3 when it comes to his spiritual mentor AND the Lord:

Samuel listened to Eli’s instruction on how to respond to the voice calling his name.

When called by God (once he listened to Eli and realized it was the Lord) Samuel responded with “Speak, for your servant is listening.”” 1 Samuel 3:10 

This whole bit ends with “The Lord was with Samuel as he grew up, and he let none of Samuel’s words fall to the ground.” 1 Samuel 3:19

By coming to God with a humble heart and a humble spirit, The Lord was with him and did not let him fall.

Samuel’s humble approach to God reminds me of James 4 where it says:

  “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.”

If you want to seek God more and find humility in your life, read and reflect on James 4 in the The Passion Translation and ask God to reveal to you areas that need humility!

I recently picked up early morning jogs in preparation for my upcoming trip to Colorado to hike Pikes Peak. It was on one of these runs that God spoke something pretty clearly to me. Now, when I say that God spoke to me, I don’t mean audibly. I’ve never actually had God speak to me in that way. Most of the time, He speaks to me internally...in my spirit. Sometimes, it’s honestly hard for me to discern whether or not it’s His voice or mine. What do I do when I have these moments of uncertainty? I align what I feel He is telling me with Scripture and I seek out Godly counsel. This was one of the few occasions where I had absolutely no doubt that it was Him. 

Now, I can’t tell you why God speaks to me quite a bit while I’m running. Maybe it’s because I’m so focused on the task at hand that my mind is actually clear for once. The distractions are limited, so I’m able to really focus on Him. It was on this specific occasion that I heard God very clearly ask: “Are you willing?” And then I began to have this inner dialogue with Him:

Me: “What do you mean by that?”
God: “Are you willing?”
Me: “Am I willing to do what?”
God: “Whatever I ask.”
Me: “I mean, I think so. Haven’t I been doing that?” 

And this goes on and on for a bit, but this is what I took from it. God is not looking for our resumes, our accomplishments, or our accolades. He’s looking for willing vessels. As I heard Him saying this to me, I immediately thought of a picture that my brother sent me a few weeks back:

What do you see? I see a few fellow Christians being hypocritical and judgmental. I see people looking at the outward appearance. I see people judging a book by its cover. I see myself and how I can be tempted to judge others by the way they look or how they’ve lived their lives. 

But, that is not how God views people. In 1 Samuel 16:7, it says that people look at the outward appearance, but that the Lord looks at the heart. God is looking not at the outward appearance - what the world sees. He is looking for willing hearts, willing vessels to be used on purpose for His purpose.

I can still remember exactly where I was when I first felt the calling to vocational ministry (a fancy way of saying that I felt called to work for a church). My wife and I had just left an Easter planning meeting in February of 2013. This was one of those times that I heard God speak to me so clearly in my Spirit, so much so that I pulled off on the side of the road to talk with my wife. I simply said to her, “I think I want to do this for a living.” 

The two of us immediately began to come up with a game plan. I would go back to college/seminary (I had graduated from UNF with my bachelor’s degree just six months earlier at the age of 31), I would read through the whole bible, start tithing and our list went on and on. I was ready to prepare myself for ministry. I was hired on by that church two weeks later. And what I learned in that season of life is that God didn’t need me to have a plan and accomplish a to-do list. He just needed my heart to be willing to serve Him with everything that I had and we see this time and time again in the Bible. 

In 2 Kings 4, we see Elisha ask a widow to be willing to pour oil into jars in order to free her family from poverty.

David as a young man, are you willing to pick up five stones and a slingshot? If so, you will rule nations and the Messiah will come from your bloodline.

In John 6, we see a young boy willing to give up his lunch (five loaves and two fish) that ended up feeding over five thousand.

Four friends in Mark 2, are you willing to carry your friend on a mat and lower him through a roof to have an encounter with Jesus? Now watch your faith heal him.

Noah, are you willing to build an ark to save humanity?

The invalid at the pool of Bethesda, are you willing to pick up your mat and walk? Then you will be healed.

So the question that I leave you with today is the same simple, yet powerful, question that the Lord asked me: “Are you willing? Are you?” Are you willing to do what the Father asks you to do? Are you willing to do it when it isn’t easy, when you get weird looks and remarks, or when people turn against you? Because if you are, He will take you on a journey that will definitely have trials and difficulties, this we know (John 16:33). But, we can rest easy knowing that it will be a life that is filled with purpose, joy, blessings, favor, and is unmatched by anything that the world can give you. Now, go; be bold, be willing, and be a world changer!

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33 NIV

What qualities do you value most in a friend? I think your friendships make or break you. In fact, a recent Harvard study even concluded that people who isolated themselves are three times more likely to have an early death. 

Yes, anyone who has ever thrived in community can attest to the fact that friendships and relationships are a necessary component to a healthy life.

You see, I believe each of us have three types of friends: 

• Casual friends - you don’t know much about them and they come and go. 

• Close friends - you have more in common, love to hang out, and there is a meaningful connection. 

• Core friends - these are the in-it-to-the-end friends; the ones you trust, invest with, drop your guard around, and give total access to your life. 

In I Samuel 23:14-18, David needs an in-it-to-the-end friend. Although our core friendships may be few, all it takes is one to be a difference maker. Jonathan rises up to be this for David and demonstrates five qualities of a true friend for life! 

1. True friends are faithful, as we read in verse 16 of this story. Jonathan did not back off with David when times got rough. He willingly pressed in, strengthened David, and was faithful to their friendship. Faithful friends are dependable friends you can count on that stick closer than a brother, like Proverbs 18:24 mentions.  

2. If we continue reading in verse 17, we see that true friends are encouraging. Jonathan tells David not to fear. Encouragers don’t ignore the reality, but they do refocus on what is positive and how to strengthen a friend to overcome adversity. Hebrews 13:13 says encourage one another daily, so none of you will become hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. 

3. True friends are helpful. Jonathan tells David in this story, “I will not let him find you; I will help, support, and be here for my friend.” The writer of Ecclesiastes 4 says if one falls down, his friend can help him up…a cord of three strands is not easily broken.

4. Being sacrificial is part of being a true friend. Jonathan knew David was anointed by God to be the next king. But, he valued their friendship more than his own right to be king. He was willing to risk it all for his friend. Core friendships will cost you time, effort, convenience, comfort, status, and sometimes even money. Jesus says greater love has no man than to lay down his life for his friends in John 15:13. This  friendship would eventually cost Jonathan his throne and his life, but he never gave up on David. 

5. True friends are direct. In one of several encounters where Jonathan followed through on his promise to be direct and tell David the truth about his father’s threats, he warns David in I Samuel 20:13. A true friend holds you accountable. I refer to this as “friendship friction:” As  iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another, Proverbs 27:17. At times, you need a friend to say the hard and painful truth spoken with love in order to build you up, not tear you down. Proverbs 27:6.

I hope I just described your spouse or your best friend. I hope I just described you. Either way, we all have some work to do, and a goal to strive for in being faithful, encouraging, helpful, sacrificial, and direct true friends. The real value of friendship is not in how many friends you have, but how many of these qualities the friends you keep have.

Give me a friend that will love me until the end, lift me up when I am down, let me in when I am out, labor with me when I am too tired, and let me have it when I am wrong. I only have a few people that know me and love me on that level, but that is enough. One is my amazing wife who is truly my best friend. 

Let me tell you about another: he is someone I met when I was just twelve years old. Forty-two years later, we are more than friends...we are brothers. Through our darkest and brightest moments, through valleys and  mountaintops, we’ve remained friends for life. I think it’s because we’ve strived to model a friendship like Jonathan and David, who exemplified so many times what it means to be a true friend. 

Let’s be honest, this is a hard list for any friend to live up to all the time. And only one ever did. He is the only one who can truly offer you all five qualities and more every second of every day. His name is Jesus...do you know him? He’s the greatest friend you’ll ever know. He laid down his life for you and nothing can separate you from his love. He will always be there for you and all you have to do is reach out and receive. In John 15:15, Jesus says I no longer call you servants, I call you friends. I have chosen you. 

I leave you with this reminder and challenge: if you want a friend for life, then become a friend for life.

As I sat at the table that evening with my five-year-old son, we played with every parent’s favorite toy…Play-Doh. Just like so many times before, he used all of his different tools to make various creations. First, it was a pizza. Next, it was a flower. Then, it was something that I could not recognize. He explained to me that it was a dinosaur. I couldn’t quite see it myself, but I played along anyway. I built him up with praise and admiration. Then we played a little longer before I suggested that we clean-up our mess.

As we swept up and crumbled what seemed like thousands of tiny pieces of broken Play-Doh, my son gave me his Play-Doh dinosaur as a gift. He wanted me to keep it forever. In that moment, the cheap red and green clay mound of this ancient creature became a revelation to me.

I began to think about how God sees us versus how we see ourselves. 

At times, we feel unworthy, undeserving, and inadequate. We have insecurities, doubts and worries about ourselves. We let someone down. We lose our temper. We fall short. We forget. We layer these feelings and hold on to them. The Play-Doh dinosaur reminded me that even when we cannot see our own worth, God sees us as beautiful creations made in His image. 

“Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness…”
Genesis 1:26 NIV

We are His prized possession. Our feelings are not who we are. There is not a single thing that we can do that will cause Him to see us any different.

“Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it.” 
Psalms 139:14 NLT

I love how the New Living Translation uses the word “complex” in this verse. We are indeed complex, sometimes convoluted, nuanced creatures and God knows it! He knows the mess we can be and loves us completely. When we feel like a mess, He still sees us as wonderfully made. 

It is likely my son will never realize how his messy, Play-Doh dinosaur spoke to me and I pray that it speaks to you. In the moments where we fall short, let’s cling to the good, good Father that loves us just as we are and sees us as perfect…even while He is still molding and shaping us into who we are meant to be!

Have you ever read about Martha in the Bible? I can relate to Martha in so many ways. If I’m totally honest, I am Martha! Maybe you are, too. 

I love reading about Martha and her siblings, Mary and Lazarus! What an incredible “real life” story we have available to us from the books of Luke and John. One of the things I love most that this family was known for is that they were close personal friends of Jesus. He seemed to enjoy spending time with them in their home. Martha hosted Jesus and the disciples on more than one occasion.

So, like any good “Martha” would do when you know that company is coming, you want to make sure the house is clean and smells good and is welcoming. You want to prepare your best meal. You want to make sure to serve that dessert you are famous for! The coffee is always ready and there are several delicious creamers to choose from….am I right? Are you starting to see yourself in this picture at all? 

While there was really nothing wrong with Martha preparing the meal that would be served and making sure her home would be comfortable and welcoming for her guests, she chose to remain busy and in so doing, missed the best part! She forgot to sit and enjoy the presence of her guest. Her dear friend Jesus was in the family room! 

Martha even felt comfortable walking into the room and complaining to Jesus about her sister Mary! (That part is a little amusing, actually.) She needed help in the kitchen and she was hoping to get Jesus to see things her way - maybe even reprimanding Mary for not helping to  prepare and serve the meal. But, that’s not at all what Jesus did. Instead In Luke chapter 10 we read what Jesus did say to her...

“Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, ‘Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.’ But the Lord answered her, ‘Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.’” 
Luke 10:38-42

In other words, a simple meal would have been fine. There was no need to go to all that extra effort, right? She was so worried about the serving and the perfecting that Martha took her eyes off of her Savior. In the busyness of “doing,” she lost her peace. 

I have to admit that this is me on so many occasions! Maybe you love to entertain, have people over for dinner, or just invite a friend for coffee. Maybe you go a tad bit overboard when you know someone is coming to stay for a few days, driving everyone around you crazy while you’re striving for perfection. You see, Mary chose the “good portion.” She didn’t want to miss anything that Jesus had to say while He was in their home. 

But before we are too harsh on Martha, I think it’s important that we notice something else about her in John, chapter 11: 

“Now a certain man was ill, Lazarus of Bethany; the village of Mary and her sister Martha. It was Mary who anointed the Lord with ointment and wiped his feet with her hair, whose brother Lazarus was ill. So the sisters sent to him, saying, ‘Lord, he whom you love is ill.’ But when Jesus heard it he said, ‘This illness does not lead to death. It is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.’ Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.” ……. 

Next, we see an amazing statement of faith from Martha...not Mary! 

“Now when Jesus came, he found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb four days. Bethany was near Jerusalem, about two miles off, and many of the Jews had come to Martha and Mary to console them concerning their brother. So when Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went and met him, but Mary remained seated in the house. Martha said to Jesus, ‘Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. But even now I know that whatever you ask from God, God will give you.’ Jesus said to her, ‘Your brother will rise again.’ Martha said to him, ‘I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day.’ Jesus said to her, ‘I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, although he die, yet shall he live, and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?’ She said to him, ‘Yes, Lord; I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who is coming into the world.’”

Notice that when Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she got up and went out to meet Him! Mary, on the other hand, remained in the house in grief. Can’t you just sense Martha’s boldness in this text? “Lord, if you had been here …” 

We often overlook Martha’s faith in the statements she made. She firmly believed that had Jesus been there, her brother would not have died! And yet, in verse 22 note that her faith is still very much alive. “But even now I know that whatever you ask from God, God will give you”  I love that...an “even now” bold faith. Martha believed that Jesus was the Christ, the Son of God who had come into the world! Martha’s faith was rewarded that very day as her brother Lazarus was miraculously resurrected from the dead. 

Mary chose to sit at the feet of Jesus, to listen, and to just lovingly be in His presence. She chose to worship Him. But, I like to think that Martha learned a valuable lesson from her sister and her dear friend Jesus on the day of her service in Luke Chapter 10, too! I believe she learned the balancing of her acts of service with her worship. 

Why do I believe that?  When all seemed lost, we see that Martha trusted her Lord! And she understood who He was. I especially love the way the Passion Translation phrases it in the Book of John. 

“Then Martha replied, “Yes, Lord, I do! I’ve always believed that you are the Anointed One, the Son of God who has come into the world for us!” 

Finally, in John 12, we see Martha serving...the right way. 

“Six days before the Passover began, Jesus went back to Bethany, the town where he raised Lazarus from the dead. They had prepared a supper for Jesus. Martha served, and Lazarus and Mary were among those at the table. Mary picked up an alabaster jar filled with nearly a liter of extremely rare and costly perfume—the purest extract of nard, and she anointed Jesus’ feet. Then she wiped them dry with her long hair. And the fragrance of the costly oil filled the house.”

Again, Mary was at the feet of Jesus. Martha was serving. But, this time Martha is not complaining or demanding help - she is simply serving her dear friend Jesus! Isn’t it so true when our attitude changes for the better, the very atmosphere around us changes? Martha is such a powerful life lesson. May we too always remember the crucial “balance” of service and worship to our Savior Jesus, The Christ, The Anointed One, The Son of God! 

Several months ago, I was called in to work unexpectedly for a looming hurricane and had to miss Sunday church services at Bold City Church. Luckily, as our Serve Team Coordinator, I was able to swing by to say hello to our teams and help out during our tear down after the 11am service. Just one of the many perks of being a mobile church! During that time, I was talking with Pastor Jason and his young son Liam had wandered off just a short distance away to check out a large rain puddle. Pastor Jason kept saying "Don't do it, Liam,” while Liam looked back at him with a look any of us parents recognize. He was away from his father and the temptation was too great. Liam proceeded to jump right into that puddle and stomp and dance all around in it. 

I jokingly said, "Well that is a perfect analogy of our relationship with our Father, isn't it?" We can be led to ignore God's will and do what we want to do, usually bringing us immediate pleasure and satisfaction. That's the human, sinful nature in us, right? But I also sensed there was more to the story as God brought this analogy to mind. 

Soon, Liam left his puddle and was off to demolish another one when all of a sudden, he slipped and belly-flopped right into the second puddle. Like any toddler, he began to cry for help. He laid in his puddle sobbing and wet, not knowing just what to do. Pastor Jason walked over and lifted him up to comfort him and let him know that he was going to be okay. 

That is a beautiful picture of what our Father does for us as well. God's love and grace is there for us in the middle of our mess, despite our disobedience. How often we find ourselves soaked in our sin and mistakes, and our Father picks us up right where we are and comforts us, showering us with love and grace. 

We don't have to remain in our puddles nor do we have to keep returning to them. We simply have to listen and heed our Father's voice when He speaks to us. It is important to note that I couldn’t hear exactly what Pastor Jason was saying to his son in his moment of need. See, God speaks to each of us in the same way. His voice is found in the whisper, not the shout. That’s why we have to stay close to Him and in His Word! I encourage you to get in your secret place, in the Bible and prayer, every morning and seek His voice and His will for your life. When the Holy Spirit leads us, we can dance and flourish in the rain and maybe even avoid a few of the puddles that life throws our way.

Have you ever gotten that eerie feeling that someone was watching you? It feels uncomfortable and you look around but you don’t see anyone. But, they are there. They are the little nuggets we call children. You see them playing and you don’t realize they are watching and listening, but they are. They are watching each and every move we make. They are listening to every word we say. Children are like a human Alexa. All the time, they are tracking and recording us. 

Being reminded of that, what is your first thought? Do you think “Oh no, they are watching and mimicking me?! They have a front row seat with no obstructions blocking their sight or hearing.” 

Let me ask you, Mom and Dad, what are your mannerisms like? Do you speak in a respectful way to each other or do you have a sarcastic tone? If you are being honest with yourself, is your home a happy place? Are you patient or do you snap? Are you consistent in showing unity or are you divided? Are they seeing the love of Jesus on display? Are you being affectionate with them? Are you helpful and encouraging? 

Simply put, every day you are building your child’s template for life. You are laying the foundation for your children to build on. The only question is...is it a solid foundation? Have you laid out a good template?

We all want to leave our children a good inheritance. I’m not talking about a monetary inheritance but rather a foundational inheritance. In this world where we experience more lies than truth, more hate than love, and more fear than joy, you have an opportunity to carve out a template that points them to the magnificent love of Jesus. But, here’s the catch: they have to see the love of Jesus in their home first each and every day and not just occasionally.                                               

In my 74 years, I’ve learned that if you put forth very little effort, you get very little back. But, if you work hard at doing what is right the results can be astounding.

Parents, if you work together at home getting those dreaded chores accomplished, children sense unity and experience peace with no harsh words. When they see affection and respect, they feel safe. When they hear strife and see a deficit of affection, they feel insecure.

Raising kids and shaping their legacy is a very serious responsibility God has placed on you. It’s not a matter of bringing your “A-game” because it’s not a game. Being a parent is a life-changing decision on your part to be the best example you can be. It’s all about the template you choose to lay out for them. Why not make it the best template you can possibly give them?

In Matthew 19:13 Jesus says “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them for the kingdom of heaven belongs to each of these.”

Do not hinder them. Let them see and experience those things that point them straight to Jesus. Our testimonies are useless if they are not pointing our children to Him.                              

You see, our spouses and children are a generous gift from God Himself. We must treat them with that in mind. God hand picked them just for you. If you don’t have a spouse or children yet, but wish to one day, why not start living now in such a way that will be an example for future generations? We must always treat those we hold most dear with love and respect. When we do, that love and respect will be returned many times over as you watch the fruit of a beautifully created template blossom!

What does the word “honor” mean in our culture today? If you’re perusing Facebook, Instagram, TikTok or whatever the latest social media platform is, it doesn’t seem like honor means much, or anything at all, really. Sadly, in our world today, honoring someone that you disagree with isn’t our natural response because the two don’t naturally co-exist in our minds. Just like I’m still unable to rub my belly and pat my head at the same time, so many people in our world today struggle to have a civil conversation with someone with whom they don’t see eye to eye. They don’t understand how to honor despite a difference of opinions.

There’s a story in the Bible that I’m always drawn to. Like so many of the stories about Jesus, it has so many layers and many things we can learn from it, so I find myself here regularly. This time around, I found three things that I believe can and will help each and every single one of us grow and walk in honor daily. In Luke 7:36, Jesus had been invited to a dinner at the home of a religious leader. During the dinner, we see an immoral woman come in and begin to kiss the feet of Jesus, wash them with her tears, dry them with her hair, and pour out an alabaster jar of perfume on his head and feet. The man who was hosting the dinner (a religious leader, mind you) thought to himself (remember, I’m paraphrasing here), “Man, if this joker really is who he claims to be, there is no way he would let that woman touch him.” Jesus of course goes on to do His Jesus things…giving out wisdom that honestly feels like a kick in the teeth. But, I want to focus on His words starting in verse 44:

Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet,but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet.
Luke 7:44-46 

Here are the three things I noticed in the words that Jesus speaks that we can use today to help us show honor:

1. BE HUMBLE. Verse 38 in this story actually says the woman placed herself behind Jesus. She was not only behind him but she positioned herself at His feet. This shows us a posture of humility. We have to posture ourselves in a place of humility if we are to honor others and follow the example of Jesus. If we stand in a position of pride, viewing ourselves as higher than others, we’ll never be able to honor others, as we will view them as beneath us. Romans 12:10 says that we are called to  “Honor one another above yourselves.”

2. WATCH YOUR LIPS. Jesus pointed out to the religious leader that He was not given a kiss when he entered the home, despite it being the custom in those times. The woman, however, had not stopped kissing his feet since she entered the home. This is where we have to ask ourselves, what are we doing with our lips? Are we using our words to edify and build up those around us? The woman used hers to show affection and love, while Simon the Pharisee used his to judge Jesus.

3. ACKNOWLEDGE THE ANOINTING. Jesus states that Simon not only disregarded the custom of giving Jesus a kiss, but he also failed to follow through with anointing his head with oil. However, the woman not only did this by pouring oil on the head of Jesus (as told in another Gospel), but she also covered His feet with it. When you choose to honor someone (note that honor is a choice), you are choosing to acknowledge the anointing and calling on their life.
   

Alright, so I know what some of you might be thinking at this point: “Yeah, but that’s Jesus. I can honor Jesus. But my jerk coworker or my mother-in-law or that idiot on Facebook that is always spewing out his political views? Nope, I can’t do that.”

So how do you honor the dishonorable? The first step that has to be taken is realizing that honor is about what you decide, not what they deserve. Aren’t you thankful that God didn’t give us what we deserved? That’s called mercy. Not only that, but God gave us what we didn’t deserve. That’s called grace. 

The definition of honor is to value something. When you start to treat something or someone as if it is common, you’re actually dishonoring them. This means that the level of honor you give is determined by the amount of value that you perceive. We have to begin to see everyone (including that co-worker or that family member or even that guy on Facebook) as valuable. Why? Because God sees them as valuable - so valuable in fact that He sent Jesus to die the death that we all deserved. So when we choose to honor others (even the dishonorable), we are choosing to honor God. I challenge you to go out today and freely give honor. Don’t make others earn it. As we walk in this, we will  become fluent in the language of honor. And as we do, I truly believe that the God we serve will honor us in return.

Whether you’re a church pastor, a ministry leader, the spiritual leader in your home, or any other kind of believer, I’ve found that the post Easter haze leftover from amazing church services and running from one family celebration to the next can often leave us all with that “What’s next?” feeling. But, I think there are a few things we can do to stay focused on what God is doing as we capitalize on that awesome Easter weekend feeling in the months to come.

For the Lead Pastor:

Celebrate by thanking the Father. 
On the Monday after Easter, I was working in the yard at my house. I spent most of the day just worshiping and thanking the Father for what He had done over the weekend. I don’t know about you, but our church had a lot to celebrate! That’s not a brag on us, but it is a brag on the move of the Holy Spirit!
(Side note: if you feel like nothing happened in your church this weekend to celebrate, please reach out to me. I’d like to encourage you!)

I’ve learned not to jump into the next thing until you’ve celebrated the current thing. Jesus is still in the business of changing people…I saw it firsthand this weekend! That’s worth stopping and celebrating right now! 

Celebrate your team. 
Ministry is 100% a team sport. We can’t do this on our own. I’ve learned that taking the time to thank people, celebrate them, and remind them of what they just invested in goes a long way. When people feel appreciated and part of something bigger than themselves, they look forward to what’s next. I’ve found individual calls, texts, and even 30-second thank you videos from my wife and I mean more than you’d think. Also, taking the time to celebrate and talk about what just happened as a team is huge! I plan to do that at our staff meeting this week. Yes, there is more on the way and we’ve got plenty of ministry in front of us. But, it’s okay to slow down and celebrate before moving on! It keeps our energy up. 

Spend time with your family. 
Most pastors’ families miss out on a lot with the Lead Pastor on Easter weekend. Make sure you take extra time to spend with your wife and kids post Easter. They need it…but you need it as well! My kids refresh my soul (most of the time). I took mine to school late on Monday so we could just lay in bed together that morning. My seven, five, and two-year-old and I talked, laughed, and had a tickle war. We fed our goats together. I made sure I took the girls to school and my two-year-old jumped on the tractor with me to cut the yard. I don’t ever want my wife and kids to feel like they are second to the church. They definitely aren’t and they can’t be. Don’t forget to prioritize them coming out of Easter and they won’t resent the church as they grow. When you do this, your wife won’t feel like she’s the side chick instead of the main chick!

For the Church:

Remember the tomb is still empty.
We should remember daily what we focused on this Easter weekend! That tomb is still empty! Don’t just shout on Easter Sunday about that! Turn everyday into an empty tomb praise party. On your way to work, listen to praise and worship. Write a verse on your mirror in your bathroom that reminds you of the resurrection power you’ve been given access to. Set reminders on your phone that tell you to stop and pray for that same power to move and flow through your life. Take Easter and make it work everyday in your life.

Don’t stop inviting.
At Bold City, we encourage our people to invite like crazy on Easter weekend and they do! But, don’t wait for the “next big service” to invite again. Inviting people into a life-changing relationship with Jesus is what the invite is really about. That should be something we do often, not just occasionally! Don’t stop inviting because Easter is behind us on the calendar. The message of the Cross carries the same power 365 days a year, 24/7! Keep inviting people to step into something that will change them forever! 

Stay faithful.
There is a reason why the Bible tells us the first church met together weekly in Acts Chapter 2. It strengthened the believer and it also grew the Church. It says they added people (Church growth) daily because the Church was faithful. Keep the pedal to the metal when it comes to Sunday service, CityGroups throughout the week, and daily prayer, worship, and Bible reading. Don’t get lazy because Easter is gone and summer is on the way! Keep growing in every season. 

(Note: When I capitalize the “C” in Church, it’s because I am referring to THE worldwide Church, the bride of Christ whom He is coming back for!)

For the “FTG” (first time guest):

Come again! 
Seriously, go back and try it again! In most cases, someone is going to remember you by your second or third visit. (This is an especially good reason to read my second point here - go to the connections center at your church and let them know you are there. We call ours The Hub.) It’s huge when someone makes a personal connection within a church family. People actually want to go to church where they have friends. I promise you will find your people if you keep coming. When you find a friend that follows Jesus, you’ve most likely found someone that is going to encourage you, pray for you, hold you accountable, and help you grow closer to Jesus! So, come again...because you’ve got a friendship waiting on you! 

Make yourself available.
Fill out a connection card so the church leaders can connect with you. This is the best way to find out more about the vision of the church, how to get going on discipleship, and where you can begin to help! (Yep, I’m already inviting you into ownership! That’s how Jesus did it.) You need to know and understand the vision of your church if you are going to truly call it “home.” You need to be available for discipleship because that’s what the Church is called to make - disciples. You need to become the Church, not just go to one. Ownership keeps your passion up. It also requires you to keep two things a priority: the Father and people. When you begin to serve in your church, you must keep your relationship with the Father growing consistently. If not, your heart will grow hard and callous towards people. The Father and people are always a priority when it comes to ownership within the Church family. 

Find another church.
Really. If you didn’t like the one you visited, go try another one! Just because one church wasn’t “your type,” doesn’t mean another isn’t. Trust me, you need the Church and Church needs you! Don’t wait until Christmas service to try again. Go visit another one this week. If that’s one isn’t for you, try another one. Ask around. Eventually, you will find a place to call home. Just one thing, make sure you aren’t showing up looking for the “perfect church.” People are the Church, so you will always see imperfections in the church building in Sunday, at least until Jesus returns for His bride. Try not to be so critical. I say find something authentic that speaks to you and jump all in. Whatever you do, keep going to church until you find something real.

Here are three things I personally look for in a church:

1. Preaching from the Bible

2. Passionate worship together

3. Serving their city

Those three things that tell me the church is alive, advancing, and on mission. 

Don’t let your faith get into a slump after Easter! A wise man once told me what you feed grows and what you starve dies! Feed your faith and fuel the flame of what God wants to do through you in community.