10 Years Sober

Today I am 10 years sober! That's 3,650 days of walking in freedom! It's 87,600 hours of being able to choose life each and every single minute!

Can I be completely honest with y'all for a second? When I started this journey, I didn't think I could do it. In fact, back then I was so riddled with doubt that I relapsed three times before finally deciding that I had to do something different. At first, I looked at my recovery like it was a burden. Something that I had to do. Why was I so different? Why could other people seem to handle themselves and I couldn't? I could not see myself not ever being able to drink again.

At every turn, I was just waiting for the ball to drop, for the next time that I would fall flat on my face, yet again. Why? Because my identity had been stolen from me. I didn't know who I was. I didn't believe that I was capable of doing anything right. I built up so many walls because I felt like no one understood what I was going through or what I had already been through. I didn't feel worthy of grace or mercy or forgiveness. I blamed God for making me different. I couldn't see that He still loved me, even through the wreckage of my past.

What changed?

Jesus! The one thing I want people to know from my testimony is that there is absolutely no way I could have gotten this far without my faith. I had already proven to myself that I could not do it alone. I was full of self-doubt because I did not truly know who Jesus was.

He showed me that He died so I didn't have to. He showed me that He redeemed all the wrong I had done. He showed me that there are people who understand. And the best thing of all, he showed me that I am worthy of grace and my life does matter!

Has it been easy every step of the way? Absolutely not! Am I perfect now? Absolutely not! But Philippians 4:13 says "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." Not some things y'all…all things. So when I face challenges or have a bad day or feel like I am not going to make it, Jesus is there to remind me that my strength does not come from others or the things that I do, it comes from Him.

Today, I don't have to look at my sobriety as an obligation, it's a right! A right that is restored to me every single day that I wake up and I am able to make my own decisions. I don't have to stay sober, I get to stay sober. I get to live, I get to have a choice, and I finally get to feel normal. Better than normal.

I am grateful for each and every person that God has put in my life to help me along the way.

If you want this kind of freedom, come visit me this Friday night at 6:00 PM at 13519 N Main Street for our very first Wayfinders meeting!