“There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
… a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance”
Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4 NIV
mourning noun (Merriam-Webster Dictionary)
mourn·ing | \ ˈmȯr-niŋ \
Definition of mourning:
the act of sorrowing
a: an outward sign (such as black clothes or an armband) of grief for a person's death
b: a period of time during which signs of grief are shown
Some time in 2019, during a Sunday morning worship set, I told our church congregation that I sensed they were in a season of mourning. I gave a brief summary of 2 Samuel 11 & 12 in the Bible and then told them that I felt their season of mourning was coming to an end. Little did I know, I was not only prophesying to them, but also to myself.
Three passages that really stick out to me regarding this topic of mourning are 2 Samuel 12, Matthew 26 and John 11.
Right before 2 Samuel 12, in chapter 11, King David sleeps with another man’s wife, Bathsheba, and she becomes pregnant. To cover it up, he tries to have her husband, Uriah, come from battle to sleep with her. He refuses until the battle is over. So, David orders Uriah to be placed on the frontline of the battlefield where he is killed. Once Bathsheba’s time of mourning the loss her husband is over, David marries her and assumes his wrongdoing is covered. In 2 Samuel 12, the prophet Nathan comes for a visit and shows David the errors of his ways, telling him that the son born to him from Bathsheba will die. We see in 2 Samuel 12:15 that “David pleaded with God for the child. He fasted and spent the nights lying in sackcloth on the ground. The elders of his household stood beside him to get him up from the ground, but he refused, and he would not eat any food with them.”
In Matthew 26, Jesus is with his disciples at the last supper. During the last supper, Jesus predicts that Peter will deny him three times. And sadly, we find Jesus’s prediction come true. “...Immediately a rooster crowed. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken: ‘Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.’ And he went outside and wept bitterly.” Matthew 26:74-75
In John 11, Jesus finds out his friend Lazarus has become sick and died. John 11:31-34 says, “When the Jews who had been with Mary in the house, comforting her, noticed how quickly she got up and went out, they followed her, supposing she was going to the tomb to mourn there. When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. Jesus wept. Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”
These passages reveal to me three things that can bring about a season of mourning:
Repentance (noticeable in 2 Samuel 12 and Matthew 26)
David repented when Nathan showed him his sin in sleeping with Bathsheba and sending Uriah to be killed. 2 Samuel chapter 12:13 says, “David said to Nathan, I have sinned against the Lord.”
Peter feels the heavy weight of denying Christ in Matthew 26:75 where it states that he went outside and wept bitterly.
Loss (i.e. the loss of a loved one)
In John 11, we see that “Jesus wept” when Lazurus died. He shows us that even while declaring the truth (He is the resurrection and the life) we still feel. Living in a fallen world will bring about pain. Even Jesus could not escape the sorrow that comes from physical death.
Unanswered prayers/Prayers answered in a way we don’t want or expect
When David’s son was sick (in 2 Samuel 12) he did weep. He says in 2 Samuel 12:22 “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, ‘Who knows? The Lord may be gracious to me and let the child live.’
The similarity between repentance and brokenness is that you have to be honest about where you are at. No matter what your processing looks like there must be a time to mourn AND a time to dance. We live in a fallen world, even Jesus had a time to weep (with Lazarus, in the garden, and I have a feeling there were other times as well). You have to be honest with yourself and honest with God. There will be and should be a time of mourning, a grieving period. If you avoid mourning because you are afraid of the intensity of brokeness and weeping you may become numb to the intensity of joy and dancing.
I had no idea when I shared from 2 Samuel with the Sunday morning congregation in 2019 that my husband Bryan and I would just a few weeks later experience the pain of having a miscarriage. In the middle of it all I thought “Why would God give that word to me knowing what we were about to walkthrough?” Through prayer and processing, I realized that I was simply prophesying into my next season without knowing it. I was learning myself that seasons of mourning will come and we will have to walk through them.
A friend of mine, after mourning the loss of her father, put it this way: “Any time you go through a bad season and you actually rely on God, letting Him comfort you, it brings you to a new level of closeness that you never would have had if you kept going the way you were going.” Each time I have finally broken down and allowed myself to mourn, I have seen immense breakthrough. I have seen God the Father in a whole new light.
I encourage you to take a look at yourself. Have you allowed yourself to mourn your loss? Do you need to repent, allow yourself to weep or be broken before God over a loss (loss of a loved one, a dream, a possession)? If you have a tugging that you need to go through a season of mourning, take some time to process. Pray, meditate on the word, worship, and talk to someone (this can be a friend, pastor, leader or counselor). Sometimes you just need a good cry and that’s okay.
[Part 2 - Getting Up After a Season of Mourning coming soon…]
